My Last Days in New York City

I can't believe my journey here is coming to an end. I gotta say that I am both relived and nostalgic. Everything is telling me to go and yet still telling me to stay. "I"ll be back." I say, but will I? Honestly, I think that it's me doubting. Once again I am living in transition. It seems that my life has been nothing but a series of transitions. I am constantly dealing with change and adapting to new surroundings constantly. Yes, I move around every year. Yes, life changes constantly and we must learn to adapt. Hey, I love change. However, I think i am reaching that point in my life where I'm saying, "Hello, um can I be still for once and maybe make a home for myself?" I still want to travel and embrace change with open arms, yet I would like to live in the same apartment for longer than a year. That so wrong?

Since being in New York, I have decided that living here is like being in a messed up relationship. The ups the downs, the love, the hate, the fighting, and the love making. The thoughts of denial that they are not right for you, yet you want them so badly. I don't know if its just that there are so many of us living on one tiny island all cramped on top of one another that bothers me. To me, it is about the frustrations of success ad what defines that here. People say that "If you can make it in NY you can make it anywhere." Well, did those people realize that they are saying, "If you can work your ass off and pay your rent and count your pennies, you will be wealthy anywhere else."  Seriously though, I do believe that to a certain degree that if you achieve goals here, you have reached "the top". However, it is not like reaching enlightenment, if you will. New York is not the only city in the universe offering opportunity. Too many people are here competing for the same roles, jobs, lifestyle, etc...

Ok, I am finished with my ranting. I will miss New York, however, and there is no doubt in my mind that I will be back to visit her. To all of my friends, I will miss you the most!!

I think that is one thing New York has given the most of, friendship. 

THANK GOD FOR FACEBOOK! Sheesh, yeah! There are a few other things about New York that I will miss:

-Upper East Side bitching

-Expensive EVERYTHING

- The street performers (esp the singing saw lady... i need to write about her)

- The hot dog vendors (even though I don't go near them)

- Central Park

- Amazing friends

- All of the shows of course!

- Crazy people in New York 

- The subway

Yeah, just ranting, love ya NY.